I supppose i should finally write one of those damn 25 lists everybody on facebook has been bugging me about.

These are in no particular order.







13.) I read advice columns that are intended to teach women what men are thinking, i ts funny how inaccurate they are most of the time.





7.) if something looks like it feels awesome, i will touch, this has led to awkward situations





23.) Pirates are marginally better than ninjas. though if you can combine the two its even better





5.) I know full well that boosh isn't actually a dictionary word, its onomatopoeia (FYI its the sound of a laser gun going off, yeah, how sweet is that?!)





14.) I love coffee, and indie music





21.) i own a hair straightener, there, i said it





17.) I am what i like to call a 'digital Luddite', i have open disdain for digital technology. i prefer analog stuff. despite this i fully exploit technology for my own purposes.





4.) i don't like feminism. no i'm not some asshole misogynist, i just don't think anybody should further the agenda of a specific demographic, i'm an egalitarian.





1.) my favorite kind of candy is maynards wine gums





15.) i have really gross feet





16.) and i really don't care





24.) i own a sword i'm not ashamed of it, its a sword!





6.) i use the aforementioned hair straightener..TO STRAIGHTEN MY HAIR! DUN-DUN-DUUUUUUN!




22.) i really likethis quote: "If I am capable of grasping God objectively, I do not believe, but precisely because I cannot do this I must believe." -Søren Kierkegaard


25.) i'm never gonna get to 25 so here it is now

-Mopey

showing inconsisant disdain for both grammar and correct, complete numbering fairly consistantly

*sigh* No, i don't know what it means either.

EMO



a word which at present has the most confused and convoluted meanings and connotations out there today. oftentimes it is used as a derogatory term. i feel this is wrong. the word has been stolen. that said, i will say that i consider myself to be emo. just now a bunch of ppl reading made a weird face in reaction to that. see, but when they here emo they think of a whiny, weepy, bitchy, self-absorbed guy in eye-liner. i am none of these (this is of course open to criticism as it is an opinion, but this is my blog so there) no i am more of a 'rivers-cuomo-circa-the-pinkerton-years' emo. mostly this just means emotionally honest and sensitive, most likely self deprecating (as the emotional self honesty often takes bravado out at the knees). to understand how we got the point where mexican kids get killed over being 'emo' we need to look at some brief history. the term emo is derived from emocore, a type of overtly emotional hardcore punk that developed in the washington D.C. are in the late eighties. as we are human we shorten things (i'm not calling this a web log after all) and emocore became simply emo and was typified by a indie sounding punk bands with so me pop sensibilities (think death cab or pinkerton era weezer or sunny day real estate or saves the day). along side this music in the nineties another punk offshoot was developing and becoming ultra popular: pop-punk (*shudder*...kinda). it seems strangely inevitable that this assimilationist form of punk would adopt the emotional honesty of these bands (now commonly called indie-emo). born from this freaky-crying-afterwards union were bands like fall out bot and taking back sunday. that is a very simplified account and shouldn't be taken as gospel. but now that my music-geekishness has gotten behind us...i seem to have nothing to say. oh, right. this music was picked up much the same way as mainstream hip-hop...the dreaded sub-urban white kid. now, where hip-hop posers can be shrugged off easily (as the experiences referenced in the music are fairly specific) the suburban white emo bitch (SWEB) can not be so easily disposed of and ridiculed. the experiences referenced within emo music are fairly universal: girls..um...sadness...meaner girls..? i dunno. anyway. the kids that picked up on this relatively upbeat music happened to be weepy and bitchy, SWEBs. goddamn SWEBs. and they took music i like, and clothes i like and filthied them up with their SWEBiness. converse + skinnies = awesome (also deceptively comfy). I mean i can't blame people for wnating that, plus the music, even the super poppy stuff is pretty good. i suppose what i am trying say (in no small part due to zombieChop's thoughts on this post) is that not all the ppl that enjoy converse, skinnies and upbeat emotional music are SWEBs. Any adherent to any cultural movement is easily ridiculed with a little thought and creativity. I mean hip-hop culture is downright funny, clothes that don't fit, improper pronunciation F-U-N-N-Y. Hipsters: they move around (culturally) afraid to not be in on the newest thing and deathly afraid the things they like will become popular(even though the artists creating these things wopuld probably love that, irony). Metalheads- "hey dudes, lets grow our hair to a length that is longer than is fashionable, wear black, and look grumpy, now that is how you look BADASS!) But all of this is and oversimplification, a stereotype, and really fun to mock. Stereotypes exist mostly for entertainment value, (that is totally not racist to say). These should stereotypes shouldn't be applied to everyone in the sub-culture they..er..stereotype, that leads to trouble, MEXICO. What an abrupt stop. how about that.

-Mopey

showing inconsistent disdain for proper capitalization fairly consistently

What the hell personal blogs?

Have you noticed that like half the blogs that exist in the vast, mad-max-ish expanse that is the internet are overly and overtly personal? why? anonymity, obviously. Now don't take this as some pseudo-intellectual bullshit, it not, at least not intentionally. The thing about the anonymity that spurs some to reveal too much is that it can also be used to entertain. who? who gives a damn. writing this entertains me, hopefully the reader. now some will inevitably argue that this anonymity is absent in those who use their real name, but none of this overly personal information is revealed in person, you don't see the look in someones eyes when they hear what you say, you don't have to deal with their responses, you can wait and mete out retaliation accordingly. again, this isn't saying i'm against putting a little 'you' into what you write, just do it creatively...covertly, like a ninja. now...valentines day...ugh. Valentines Day: or, the commercialized cash grab that exploits romance every fucking year. You obviously can't celebrate your feeling on any other day with anything but a [insert product here]. Fuck off.
I mean, celebrating the l-word (not lesbian) should happen everyday. Really. in fact, i think next year i'm just going to commemorate st. valentine two calendar days earlier and later than i'm "supposed to". And i'll even *gasp* do it without material gifts (maybe flowers, but i mean, who doesn't love to get flowers) maybe i'll write a poem or a song, or cook dinner. As you may have noticed i just figured out how to italicize things. Also i like zombieChops idea of signing off...(out?).

-Mopey

showing inconsistent disdain for proper capitalization..consistently

um...

Two celebrities of awesomeness have a very...uncomfortable..conversation:



1;23-Patrick Stewart-
-i found this sweet punk band called fucked up and they are awesome

1:25pm-Sean Connery-
-i finally fucked a chick in the ass

1:26pm-Patrick-
-oh...gross

1:26pm-Sean-
-it was awesome

1:26pm-Patrick-
-i really don't wanna talk about this

1:27pm-Sean-
-you should ask ur women for the brown belt
i can loosen her up for u if u want sometimes they cry i hear
the first time i mean
crying turns me on

1:28pm-Patrick-
-stop

1:28pm-Sean-
-micks an asshole dont listen to him
but its not a bad idea hahahahaha

1:28pm-Patrick-
-about?

1:29pm-Sean-
-what?

1:29pm-Patrick-
-don't listen to mick about what?

but whats not a bad idea?

1:29pm-Sean-
-his dirty talk about Anna ...thats her name right?

1:30pm-Patrick-
-yeah, what dirty talk?

1:30pm-Sean-
-about the butt sex

1:31pm-Patrick-
-what?
what about butt sex?

1:31pm-Sean-
-are you high?

1:31pm-Patrick-
-no

1:31pm-Sean-
-he was talking about loosening up your girlfriends asshole

1:31pm-Patrick-
-you're fucking not making sense and talking too much about anal

-oh that was mick?

-...ugh, gross

1:32pm-Sean-
-yeah you fuck!
im so fucking high

1:32pm-Patrick-
-*sigh*
i'm goin for a beer, ttyl

How Tokyo Police Club Saved The World

It is now 2009 and the robopocalypse has not yet come to pass. This is a good thing. I for one credit the humble indie heroes of the tokyo police club. I also disdain capitalization, apparently (unless it begins a sentence, as lack thereof usually leads to things looking disjointed). But i digress. Way back in 2006 the aforementioned indie heroes predicted the coming of the robopocalypse in the song 'Citizens of Tomorrow'. Huh, turns out my disdain for capitalization is fairly inconsistent. In said song they predicted that we would be under the domination of shiny metallic overlords by the year 2009. But (i suspect) due to their three year forewarning, and their super-canadian-indie-rock-laser-vision powers, the robo-coup has been thwarted. In an epic battle of sheer unbridled awesomeness aided by Ash (from Army O' Darkness) and ironically enough Robo-Cop, they defeated the mighty forces of robot-dom. Yeah.

Tits and violence, or as i shall henceforth say, tits-violence; is it all we really want? I mean everyone loves tits...epic boobs are proof of that, and history has shown that mankind loves violence more than anything....hmmm....not quite sure where i was going with that, i guess all anyone really wants is tits-violence. Damn, only go to say it once. TITS-VIOLENCE!! (twice)

Why Manscape?

Why when i sit to write can i never think of anything worthy to write about? When i'm sitting around doing nothing i have a thousand ideas that i should write about, but when i want to, nothing. Honestly, the best i can think of how damn awesome bruce campbell is, like seriously, hes awesome. Groovy. Also, Jagermeister, while delicious leads to badness. This is relevant. I swear. One of the weirdest things you notice from watching movies from the not so distant past is that the boobs are different, not just that there are more real ones, they're just....different. That, and you notice that the men are a lot hairier. Now its not that the people are any different, or that there has been a subtle evolutionary shift towards hairlessness; no, its shaving. My main query is why? Why do men feel the need to remove the hair from their body, why manscape?
Most answers i get are that hairlessness is awesome and that women think hair is gross, but these are both subjective. Logically these should both hold true in the past but somehow do not, its not like theres been a great leap forward in hair removal technology, its pretty much the same. As you can most likely tell i am a hairy dude, and as such i have somewhat of a bias. Many people tell me that i should remove my copious amounts of body hair, but i steadfastly refuse to until someone can give me an objective reason to do it. Besides, Bruce Campbell is a hairy dude, and hes awesome.